Subtitling provided by Wolfe Video.
Mmm, get off me.
Mmmm.
Get off.
I'm sleeping.
I thought you loved me.
God, not when you smell like fish.
Oh, gross.
We've got to get these off of you.
Okay.
Oh, baby, I think we should really just do this.
I mean, let's just walk in there.
What are they gonna do?
Don't start, please, Alex.
No, come on.
You're letting them push you around.
Look, I don't want to screw this up.
My family will eat you alive.
You have no idea.
Yeah, well, maybe I can handle being eaten alive.
Shit.
Turn it off, Alex.
Damn it.
I think we're going.
We're going.
We are going!
We're gone.
The amazing part is that I got away with it for so long.
The look on my dad's eyes when I got caught was just blank,
as if he didn't know me.
I guess he doesn't.
But I know me.
And I know that the me who was selling that stuff
is not the me that I want to be.
Wow, you said that in front of the entire school?
Yeah.
We all have to do it.
Look at you.
I have never seen you so-- so confident.
That takes guts, what you did.
I'm really proud of you.
Really?
Yeah.
Can I ask you something?
What if--
well, I know this guy, right?
He lives in my dorm, and he really likes this girl.
He likes her so much, and she doesn't know.
I told him I'd help him.
Um, well, my experience with this kind of thing
is that if they really know each other well,
then he would know whether it was the kind of thing
that could go beyond friends or not.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, I think so.
Maybe the guy just needs to come right out and say it?
I think, uh, he should probably hold off.
I mean, make sure he's not acting on impulse.
That can sometimes ruin a friendship.
I'd tell him to be careful.
Uh, Andrew, I gotta go,
but I wanted to tell you something.
I might be at your house this weekend.
What?
You're coming to my house?
I know your sister Casey.
I've never told her that you're my client.
I just want you to know that whatever happens,
there's a special bond between us,
and nothing can take that away.
You know that, right?
Right.
Sure.
Can I bum a smoke?
No cigarettes, okay?
Just be careful.
Maybe I'll see you this weekend.
Okay, I just need to make sure in bar 18
that it's not too loud.
Make it more of a mezzo piano--
Make it more of a mezzo piano entrance,
and then you can fade into the ensemble that way.
Okay, strings, I need to be sure and hear the choir.
Choir, please, lots of tex.
I'm glad you're here.
Okay?
Okay, we're almost out of time, so what I'd like to do
Is start from the beginning, and we'll take It to ber 32.
If we get it all right, then we can go home.
Okay, from the top.
Basses, and...
Have you been down there all night?
Yeah.
Why don't I make you some eggs?
You have six new messages.
Message number one.
It's Antoine checking In 10:30.
Message deleted.
Message number two.
I'm going to the store with my mom,
and I'll call you at 12:00.
Message number three.
I'm home now.
I hate it when they do that.
As if I know who he is.
Of course, I do.
Message number four.
Message number five.
(girl) It's NIcoie.
I was at a clinic, like you said.
I'm home right now...
Message number six.
Listen, I hate to do this to you,
but GIvon's court date has been moved.
You need to be there at 11 :00.
Call me If you have any questions. Bye.
You have to go to court today?
Yeah, I think they're gonna lock him up.
I have no say.
God, I hate this.
(Casey) Um, how the hell are you supposed to get them in here?
There.
Now fix the hot water heater,
'cause Carmen's gonna flip if we have no hot water.
Yes, ma'am.
[man speaking indistinctly over radio]
Babe, can you pass me my toolbox?
What?
Nothing.
I like it when you use tools.
Do you?
It's almost fixed.
Baby, you're so great.
Are you sure that shirt isn't too tight?
Those kids have enough distractions as it is.
I mean, if I were a 1 7-year-old boy...
Fine.
Just be prepared for some major attention.
Are you saying that I look good in this shirt?
[phone ringing]
I already left. I already left.
Hello?
Hi, Mom.
Listen, I can't chat right now.
I'm eating breakfast.
Mom, I already told you.
Tell her we'll be there tonight.
(Casey) I'm not gonna to fight with you about this.
I'm spending tonight with Alex and a friend.
Unless of course you want all three of us.
I didn't think so.
Mom, I'll be home for Christmas Eve,
but I'm not coming to the party tonight without Alex.
Yes, I'll be home for dinner tomorrow night.
Well, I live just across the bay.
We do, too, have heat.
And electricity.
You know, Shawn could come over here.
O-okay. Good-bye.
Oh.
Hi.
Great leisure suit.
Why?
Do you like it?
Nah, it's good.
Hungry?
No, I'm good.
Feel like helping me with these?
Mm-hmm.
Didn't we do this last month for Thanksgiving?
Yes, and people used them,
which is why we're doing it again.
Oh.
Well, they look fine to me.
This looks fine to you?
I guess not.
Is Shawn down there?
[sighs] What do you think?
Casey.
Mom, no.
Andrew needs a ride home from the station.
What about Shawn?
Don't you--
don't you people have to go to the train station anyway
and pick up that friend ofyours?
What time is his train?
3:30.
Fine.
[tender piano music]
Good. All right.
Come on, man.
Okay, I got it. I got it.
That's it. Come on.
[shutter clicks]
[knock at door]
(boy) Uh, yeah, give me a sec.
What's the lrish seven course meal?
I don't know. What?
A sic-pack and a potato.
Come on In.
Dad told me that one.
Yeah, it's a good one.
What's up, dude?
Nothing. I thought you were--
I'm not. I'm not even here right now.
I'm a figment of your imagination.
Oh.
Huh.
Jesus, Shawn.
These are amazing.
Is that us?
Oh, I haven't seen these in forever.
Yeah, I was putting together something for Mom.
I'm not sure, though.
Oh.
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
Go for it.
You're really good.
Thanks.
I'm sure she'd like them.
What are you gonna do?
I don't know yet.
I gotta think of something.
Mm-hmm.
Is that Derek?
Yeah.
[man over radio] ...makes me wanna break right down
music and ask her If I can have a little...
You know why I'm not coming home tonight, right?
Yeah, I think I heard Ma say something about that.
I mean, they refuse to invite Alex.
I gotta take a stand.
Yeah, good.
Case, I'm not getting involved with it, okay?
Fine.
Good.
Well, let me know when you know.
Okay? Call me beck.
Selling lots of bowls?
You bet.
Got a new marketing campaign.
"Don't be in a rush to flush."
[laughs] Catchy.
Yeah, it feels right.
Yeah, I would certainly hope so.
Yeah, I tell you.
My nutcase daughter.
Boston Green Bowls was her idea.
She was really onto something back in her tree hugging days.
She was never like that.
Naw, you're right. She's a smart kid.
Yeah, Derek always had his eye on her.
Tough this time of year, huh?
Christmas is the toughest.
Well, the Patriots had a hell of a year, huh?
Uh, they sure did.
Yeah, great.
Listen, Jim, thanks very much.
Happy Holidays.
Thank you.
All right.
I'm, uh-- I'm gonna head in.
I'll see ya.
Hey, Shawn.
Hey, Shawno.
Hey.
You look good.
Doin' okay?
Yeah, I'm-- I'm doing fine, yeah.
How's college?
Uh, you know, it's all right.
Yeah, you remember what I always say:
don't study too hard; it gives you a headache.
[engine turns]
(women) music Don we now our gay apparel. music
music Fa la la, la la la, la la la. music
music Troll the ancient yuletide carol. music
music Fa la la la la, la la, la la. music music
[both laugh]
Has the controversy been resolved?
There is no controversy.
She won't be here.
Ouch.
She will be dropping Andrew off.
Great, the two prodigal children in one car.
Can I get a Polaroid as they drive by?
It would be nice.
It might be the only glimpse we get.
What did she tell you?
I only know that she was concerned about the weekend.
Well, she has made it very clear where her priorities are.
Mom, what time does the party start?
I don't think it's been very easy for her, Maggie.
Well, it--
Mom, what time does the party start?
It hasn't been easy for us either.
I don't want to get in the middle,
but you have never even met Alex.
You've never given her a chance.
Mom, what time does the party start?
[together] 5:30.
We live in different worlds, don't we?
I am not ready to have her in my house.
(girl) Who?
Nobody. Forget it.
Who?
Alex.
I like Alex.
She has a tattoo.
Mmm.
On time, as usual.
[humming]
[man gasps]
What?
What is that?
Oh.
Oh, that's nasty.
It looks like a giant booger.
Stop.
Didn't we talk to you about this,
about picking your nose?
Gotcha.
[laughs]
All right, where are the shrimp?
Nobody is having shrimp.
We have a party here tonight, remember?
I had some earlier.
Talk to me, boy.
Where are they?
[phone rings]
Hello?
I couldn't find anything.
Well, now we don't have any time to get ready for the party.
We're not going to the party, Alex.
[engine stops]
They're not ready.
Besides, you should be happy.
I told them I wouldn't go unless she invited you and Carmen.
Oh, and she didn't jump at the chance?
Nope. Isn't that weird?
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
You said that you wouldn't go unless I was invited?
And she knows that that's why you're not going?
Yep.
I don't think she's too happy about it either.
[gasps] I'm surprised.
Oh, I'm really proud of you.
There's one other thing.
Yeah?
We gotta pick Andrew up at the station.
Perfect.
We were going anyway.
She suckered me at the house today.
What could I do?
And besides, it'll be good.
I haven't seen in him in, like, six months,
and you can meet him.
But no touching; he doesn't know.
Hey.
This better be, like, soap or something.
Oh, that'd be good.
Me telling them they need a good washing.
You know how they are.
Nothing is ever good enough.
And besides, your "Buy a cow for a Guatemalan village" present
was a bomb last year.
Well, it must have smelled pretty damn good.
Yeah, they're both for me, actually.
Oh, right, yeah.
So, uh, how much?
I don't remember.
Uh-huh, yeah.
How much?
Casey.
Uh-oh, it's happening.
Casey, you know I'm gonna get it out of you.
$220 a bottle.
What?
You spent $440 on them?
$472.50 to be exact. Tax.
Uh, we have no money, remember?
You just blew $4,000 on supplies.
That was my entire savings.
I'm gonna pay you back.
I hate how you always bring that up.
You know, if you're gonna blow that kind of money,
you should at least give it to people who really need it.
Okay, Miss Save the World, that's enough.
Are we gonna fight?
Uh, maybe.
I'll take them back.
You don't have to take them back.
Just forget it.
No, you're right.
They should go back.
Really?
Now l-- I feel stupid now.
No.
No need to discuss it any further.
I knew it.
Where else would you be?
Some things never change.
You okay?
I'm fine.
Sort of.
Well, I'm here now.
And I am going to take care of you,
and we are going to get through this.
[both make kissy sound]
Where's your husband, huh?
She can handle a job like that.
Well, if you hadn't brought your entire life with you.
She's off getting Andrew.
Her little brother?
The brother?
We're gonna meet the family?
No, no, it's just--
the whole thing is a nightmare.
Just don't say anything, okay?
Okay.
You look great.
Are we all riding together?
Let's go!
Use the knees, baby.
music Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way. music music
Hey, Andrew.
What are you doing here?
I got roped into picking you up.
I thought Jimmy was picking me up.
No, Ma asked me to come.
What's up with the hair?
What's up with the tie?
Do I look okay?
Yeah, you're a hunk.
I know that.
I bet Mom's pissed, huh?
What, about my hairdo?
Nah, she got the same cut.
I'm so funny.
(Carmen) Hey, sexy.
Did you miss me?
Hello.
You're looking snazzy, as usual.
Well, you never know who you're gonna meet on a train.
So...
this is your little brother, Case?
[whistles]
Not so little anymore.
Yep, this is Andrew.
Andrew, Carmen.
And this is Alex.
Hi, it's nice to meet you.
I've heard a lot about you.
Right.
So how's your sugar daddy?
Old news.
I'm dating Miguel now.
It's a struggle, though.
You know, we live with his entire family
and the goats and the chickens and whatever else.
Oh, yeah, you're a real woman of the people, huh?
Porsupuesto, chica.
(Alex) Puta.
Madre.
[Alex laughs]
What do you think?
Not that one.
Somewhere in Boston there is a Pinto without seat covers.
[laughs]
It was a gift from Casey.
Figures.
[sighs]
You spoken to Drew?
Yeah, he called this morning.
I don't know.
That place gives me the creeps.
What do you mean?
I don't know.
He just seems so well-adjusted.
It makes me nervous.
Maybe he is.
Pay enough money for him to be there.
So where is he, anyway?
Casey's gonna pick him up.
Oh?
I thought she wasn't coming tonight.
Well, she was on her way to the train station anyway.
Can't you just let her be?
Shotgun!
Carmen has arrived.
[speaking secret language]
[Alex speaking secret language]
They have their own language.
Oh, I'm sorry, Andrew.
We've just known each other forever.
So.
What's your story?
It's broken.
Fix it later.
My story?
What do you mean?
(Carmen) Like, are you in college?
(Andrew Yep, I'm a sophomore.
No, actually I'm in exile at boarding school.
I didn't realize boarding school was exile, Drew.
Pretty much.
You know how it is.
I'm the black sheep of the family.
Oh, really?
You're the black sheep of the family.
I never knew this.
Yeah, well, obviously, you don't know everything.
[people talking]
I see the entire town made it as usual.
Nice place.
Do I get a tour?
Uh...
Just kidding.
I know we're forbidden fruit.
They can come in. It's just--
(Alex) Yeah, we just really gotta go somewhere.
We're actually kind of late.
Hey.
I'll be back in a sec.
Don't worry. We'll go for a swim.
It was, um, nice meeting you.
Um...
Ooh, he is too much.
Ow!
[Good King Wenceslas playing on piano]
Hi. Good to see you.
Good, thanks.
I'm off from boarding school.
I'll be back.
Hi, Mom.
Hi, honey.
(woman) Casey.
Hi. Happy Holidays.
It's so good to see you.
You weren't even gonna say hello?
I saw you this morning.
Did you have to come home looking like that?
Mom, I wasn't planning on being here.
Oh, yeah, that's right.
I forgot.
You had to be with Alex.
You said her name, Mother.
Good.
Merry Christmas to you too.
Yes, it is a merry Christmas, isn't it?
With no help from you.
My mother, the poster girl for guilt.
You know, it's five years since Derek is gone.
Your family needs you.
think about others.
Is that what you're doing, Ma?
Thinking of others?
You think I'm being selfish, hmm?
Bullshit.
I'm tired of lying all the time about who I am,
and I'm tired of you refusing to meet her.
Please.
Don't tell me how this feels.
Because we're hurting too.
Hurting?
Please.
What happened to my beautiful daughter?
I mean, you come home here dressed like a--
like a longshoreman.
I mean, if people didn't know already,
they certainly do now.
I am a longshoreman.
Do you want to make a scene?
Do you even care if I'm happy?
Why does everything have to be about you?
I just want to know: do you want me to be happy?
'Cause I'm happy, Mom,
happier than I've ever been, and it'd be nice if you cared.
Good, you're still here.
Come on.
[sighs]
[radio static]
What a joke.
This is so much fun.
I love hanging out in the driveway while your girlfriend
parties with the family who won't accept her life,
her lover, her home, her car, or her job.
Hmm, what else?
I just wish she would get out here.
God, I hate it when she does this.
Oh, I can't believe I was introduced to Andrew.
I know. He seemed a little stunned.
I mean, why is she even in there, anyway?
You know, it's kind of rude,
because I thought that we were gonna--
Carmen, Carmen, it's complicated.
Okay.
God, this is such a mess.
I feel like we're back in high school,
Iike in Jimmy Briggs' car.
Yeah, waiting for a good time to roll around.
Oh, we consummated our relationship that night, huh?
What?
Our little make-out session.
Don't you remember?
A make-out-- the little peck on the lips?
I was blown away.
I mean, you were so-- you were just so hot.
Oh, please. Please.
music "All Holy" do they cry. music
music In Heaven the church triumphant music
music adores with all her choirs music
music the militant on earth music
with humble falth admlres.
I gotta go.
Hey, that was great.
Thanks. I gotta go.
Hey, you got a minute? I got a great joke.
Dad, this family's a joke.
Pull my finger.
Dad.
Pull my finger.
Dad, no, I don't need your fart jokes right now.
Stay for a minute.
Make your mother happy.
Alex is in the car.
You know why beer goes through you so fast?
No, no why?
Doesn't have to change colors.
[all laugh]
£¨Shawn) Whoa, who are those babes?
The hot one's my drug and alcohol counselor.
Jesus, there's a full-time job, huh?
Kiss my ass.
Hello. Come out here.
Let's see if these hens like rooster.
Shawn, what are you doing?
Look out, here comes a big cock.
thunk!
(Casey) Oh, isn't this aweet?
The boys all playing together just like old times.
You guys shouldn't be drinking.
What if Jeremy shows up?
Oh, jeez, here comes the Sobriety High lecture.
You know what?
Fuck you, Shawn.
You guys need to wake up.
Na, na, na.
[laughing]
[classical music over stereo]
(cholr) Glorla, Glorla.
You sound great.
Well, it's just a practice recording.
But you can hear Casey's voice.
Listen; she's an alto.
No, you can't.
Yes, you can.
Listen.
You can.
Glorla, Glorla.
In Excelsls Deo.
I'm gonna go to bed.
Mind if I turn it down?
No.
Hello.
Did you and Carmen have fun?
Casey.
What?
You want to tell me what happened?
What's there to say?
Same old story.
I never get it.
She's always been this way.
Why does she seem so cruel?
We were friends, you know?
Her voice was the loudest at all my games.
I remember this one game.
I took six shots.
I made every single one of them.
You know how difficult that is, Alex?
She took us all out afterwards for burgers.
She was known for that.
And then it all stopped when I told them.
And all there's been is this inescapable silence.
I mean, after the accident, no one talked about shit anyway.
I don't know why I judge myself.
My mother always said,
'"When all is said and done, you have your family."
But do l?
It's not like they'll even touch my life.
[seagulls crying]
[tender piano music]
music music
[seagulls crying]
[tender piano and string music]
music music
[woman vocalizing]
music music
What are you doing?
You should be in bed.
I just...
love you so much.
And, um...
There's something I have to tell you that...
I haven't been telling you.
Okay.
I really fucked up.
It was really hard with Andrew, because...
I actually know him.
I've been working with him.
What?
My Andrew?
Um, about six months ago,
he got into some trouble.
He was arrested for dealing drugs and--
What? I was assigned--
Is he doing drugs?
No, he's yotally clean now.
He's doing really well.
Better than ever, actually.
Um.
Great.
And, um, I was assigned to his case.
And I shouldn't have taken it,
but he was in a lot of trouble.
And so I arranged with the couets and your parents
What? to get him sent to BAT.
You met my parents?
I worked with them.
What the fuck were you thinking?
[Latin music]
[music stops]
What happened?
I told her.
What are you gonna do?
I don't know-- pack my bags.
So should l-- sh--should I leave?
I'm just being dramatic, Carmen.
It's not like we just ended it.
Well, it's kind of a big deal.
[dial tones beeping]
[clears throat]
Hi, is this Mr. Olsen?
Yeah, hi, this is Alexandra, Andrew's caseworker.
Merry Christmas to you too.
Um, is Andrew up?
No, no, please don't wake him.
Um, he left a message,
and I just wanted to make sure everything was okay.
Great.
Would you let him know that I called?
Thanks.
And, um, just call me if you need anything.
Bye.
I'm on duty all day.
You want to come with me?
Sure.
£¨Shawn) music It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas music
music everywhere you go. music music
Did I tell you the one about the one-legged Irishman?
Gee, I don't think so, Jamie,
but I bet he did his Christmas shopping on time.
With one leg?
I don't think so.
Where do you people think you're going?
Well, some people have to work around here.
Oh, don't give me that shit.
And I do nothing in this place?
You people better have all your shopping done,
because I need some help around here.
We have everyone coming to this house for dinner tonight,
and this place is a pit.
I already did most of my stuff.
I just have a few more presents to get, okay?
I even cleaned my room and made my bed, Ma.
All right, just relax.
When's Casey coming home?
Gee, I don't know, Andrew.
Maybe you ought to call her.
Easy, Ma.
Somebody's had too much coffee.
We'll be back in an hour, and, um...
I'll call her.
splash
[boys talking]
I asked you for a cigarette, you prick.
I don't got a light; it's the same thing.
Chill out, man.
(boy) Oh, It's the white lady with the Volvo again.
To find Givon.
Um, have you seen Givon?
Yeah, he's at the store.
Oh, really?
Just like last time.
Come on, man.
I really-- I just gotta talk to him.
He didn't show up at his court date yesterday.
You know, if they find him before I do,
you know what's gonna happen, right?
All right, we'll let him know you were here.
All right, just--
you know, just tell him to call me.
That's it.
Okay. Okay?
All right. Do it.
Okay. See you later.
Bye.
Dude, I got her number.
Awesome. Look at that.
Yo, what are you doing?
Give it back.
Stop.
Nice view.
What the hell is wrong with you people?
Who the hell lives on a boat anyway, huh?
Huh?
Ow.
Jesus Christ.
Hey.
Hi.
Oh.
How you doing, Case?
Just fine.
Yeah? I can tell.
You want a laugh?
Not really.
Come on.
It's our high school debut performance.
Come on, guys; let's watch.
Oops.
Casey.
Don't leave.
I don't think you should go home.
(Casey) Oh, really?
Well, thanks for the tip.
Have you ever seen my mother when she's in a state?
Actually, I've never had the pleasure.
It's just for family dinner.
I have to go.
You always say that.
You don't have to do anything.
You're an adult.
You don't have to listen to your parents anymore.
Look what they're doing to us.
You did this, Alex.
You're acting like I set out to hurt you and your family.
Why would I do that?
I don't know.
I don't want to talk about this right now.
If the only reason you're going is because you have to be there,
then that is not good enough.
You have to be here too.
That's not just it, Alex, and you know it.
I can't explain.
It's complicated, isn't it?
Go.
Shit.
Shit. Shit.
Just go up there and knock on the door.
No.
Carmen, do it.
No.
All right, what am I gonna say?
Go up there and go, "Oh, hi!
"I'm here to do a singing telegram"?
No, just say that you're delivering these to Casey.
I don't wanna go.
[knocking]
Hi.
Hello.
Oh, are those for me?
[both laugh]
Are, uh, you two going in?
Well, that depends. Are you going in?
Yeah, this is my family.
Oh, so you know Casey.
Uh-huh. She's my cousin.
Do you know her?
Well, Alex sure knows her pretty well.
I don't.
Alex?
The Alex?
We finally meet. Hi.
Jeremy, right?
Listen, can you do me a big favor?
Sure. What do you need?
Would you give these to Casey?
She forgot them.
Why don't you bring them in yourself£¿
Aren't you coming in?
Uh, no.
Don't tell me.
They still haven't come around.
Yeah.
And, um, we haven't met yet.
Hi, I'm Carmen.
Hi.
It's nice to meet you.
Well, I'm--I'm sorry that you won't both be coming in.
Me too.
But, anyway, uh, I'll make sure that Casey gets these.
Bye.
[no audio]
[mumbling]
[laughing] You're not going anywhere.
Is this where the party is?
Hey, Merry Christmas.
Jeremy.
Mom.
We just tried to call you.
Well, I'm doing a story in New York,
and I figured I'd surprise you.
Merry Christmas.
Hey, man!
Good to see you.
Merry Christmas.
Hey, handsome, good to see you.
Haven't in a while.
Hello, this is from someone special.
Merry Christmas.
Hello there, beautiful.
Oh, did I miss you.
Did you miss me? Mm-hmm.
I don't believe you.
Merry Christmas.
Who's this ravishing creature?
Darling, it's good to see you.
You look fabulous.
Great to see you, honey.
I'm so glad you came.
(Jamle) Well, everybody's here.
Who's for eggnog?
Oh, I'll definitely have some.
Maggie, it looks absolutely fabulous.
(Maggie) Thank you, my dear.
Kathy was a big help.
Thank you, Kathy.
Hey, Case, remember that guy
who ratted on us about the crab apples?
The guy in the Camaro?
Yeah, I saw him down at Java the Hut.
I know he remembered me.
Did you say anything to him?
Are you crazy? That guy was a psycho.
The famous throwing incident.
We didn't really throw them at the cars.
We were aiming for the street.
That's right.
It just so happened, whenever we threw 'em a car passed by.
[all laugh]
That guy was such a jerk.
I still can't believe he came up to the house like that.
I know--I thought he was gonna take a swing at Dad.
I was gonna kick his ass.
What were you, about eight?
I bet you could have really given him a run for his money.
(Hannah) And then what happened, Uncle Jamie?
Oh, nothing much.
Uh, Casey tried to kill her brother.
And she took Andrew, who was all of three at the time,
up into a tree, because they couldn't just aim from the yard.
We were playing army; we had to be hidden.
Yeah, it was an air raid.
Oh, you remember those-- those army pants
that you used to always wear?
Remember, everybody thought--
everybody thought you were a boy?
[laughing] Now, that was funny.
Come on.
And then what happened?
Like, 50 firemen showed up to save Andrew,
who was falling out of a tree.
They used one of those super-long ladders,
and the police had to block up the street.
Right, the neighbors really loved that one.
And then what happened?
They put us in the slammer.
(Kathy) No, they were just grounded for about two years.
Uh, Jamie, he's not supposed to have anything to drink.
You think I can't have a glass of wine in front of me
without drinking it?
So, Jeremy, what types of stories you been working on?
Oh, a little bit of this, a little bit of that.
£¨Shawn) music Bomp, chicky wah wah. music
music Chicky wah wah. music music
[laughing]
[country music]
[Alex speaking secret language]
What can I get for you gals?
Uh, I will have a Harpoon.
And you, MIss?
I will have a tequila straight up
and a Harpoon back.
It's gon' be
(together) a long night.
[both speaking secret language]
So what brings you two out on Christmas Eve?
We're Jewish.
Ah.
Merry Christmas.
L'chaim.
What did you just say?
L'chaim.
[laughs]
[all talking and laughing]
So, Hannah, you nervous?
No, I never get nervous.
Nervous for what?
For my Christmas solo.
Like, 500 people will be there, Casey.
Where?
Church.
Hannah's performing at church tonight?
Since when?
(Hannah) Since forever.
I thought you already went to mass.
We always go to midnight mass on Christmas Eve, Casey.
No, actually, we don't.
I need some air.
What? What did I do?
No, nothing, Hannah.
I'll go find her.
(Jamle) Hannah. Hannah.
You didn't tell her we were going to church?
What is the matter with you people?
We're Catholic.
Catholics go to church.
Jesus didn't.
Yeah, and he got crucified.
Come on.
I'm glad to hear you both learned something at C.C.D.
Why is she so mad?
Well, maybe she wants to be with her girlfriend.
I saw Alex outside.
I was informed that she's not allowed in.
That has nothing to do with this, Jeremy.
What do you mean?
Alex--girlfriend?
What are you talking about?
Jesus, she's gay, you tool.
Shawn.
We didn't think you were ready, honey.
Ready?
Everybody knew.
You knew?
Did you?
What about Hannah?
She knows.
What about truth?
God, you guys must think I'm a real idiot!
Honey, sit down.
[Shawn laughs]
Stop it, Shawn.
Shawn!
Fucking"A," Mom, that was--
I said stop it!
[laughing]
(Jeremy) I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything.
That's right. You shouldn't have.
Stop it, Shawn.
Everything is fine.
Oh, yeah.
We are dealing with this In our own way.
(Jamie) Oh, really, Maggie?
What way is that?
Excuse me.
Whose side are you on, anyway?
You know what, Ma?
You just don't fucking get it, do you?
You never fucking get it!
That's the problem! Stop it!
Cut that out! Sit down!
Well, I hope you're happy.
[knocking at door]
Who is it?
(Hannah) It's me.
Can I come in?
[water running]
What's wrong, Case?
Nothing, Hannah. I'm fine.
My mom just lies, okay?
Why do we always have to fight?
I'm so sick of this family.
Hannah.
[Hannah playing gentle piano music]
music music
Well, you got your wish.
Mom, please.
Hannah, honey, you need to go into the other room.
Everyone's getting ready to go to church.
Look, if you guys want me to facilitate--
What?
Sometimes if you try to tell
the other person's side of the story, it can help.
Like this, Aunt Maggie.
You be gay; Casey, you be the mom.
How does it feel?
Oh, honey, that's ridiculous.
We're fine with it.
This has nothing to do with that.
Nice, Mom.
The only one of us who actually has a clue.
Why are you doing this?
You were raised Catholic.
Can't you just do this for me?
This isn't a Catholic thing.
The reality is, we talked about it,
and I told you I'd come home for dinner tonight, and that's it.
I'm not staying here all night.
Well, neither is Andrew, thanks to you.
What?
He's upset.
Jeremy told him.
I told you he couldn't handle it.
You gotta be shitting me.
The boat's missing.
Shawn went out to look.
I'll go.
[slow country music]
[man over radio] Silent night,
music holy night.
It's a good thing we can walk back from here,
'cause I am loaded.
Yeah, that's the advantage to living on the boat.
Yeah, I guess there has to be one.
I mean, you can imagine what it took me to move here,
Iet alone onto a boat.
But Casey--she--
she had this grand idea it was gonna be so romantic.
I told you about the time
her mom dropped by unexpectedly, didn't l?
Mm-hmm.
Hiding in the bathroom for an hour.
She made you hide in the bathroom?
I mean, what kind of people are these?
Why doesn't she just tell her mom to go fuck off?
She can't, Carmen.
They're her family.
She loves them.
Well, I'm here now.
It's a good thing, 'cause you'd be all alone.
You hungry?
Let's order some wings.
I'm hungry. I'm so starving.
Hey.
Good work.
Yeah, I really got 'em going tonight, huh?
Fuck you, Case.
Whoa, somebody's got a pole up his ass.
Hey, nothing's serious with you.
You know, they all just freaked.
And that's my fault?
No, I want to know how this is my fault.
This thing with Alex, okay.
I don't know why you always have to make
such a big deal out of it, that's all.
I'm not making a big deal; everybody else is.
Hey, Andrew's life is fucked, my life is fucked,
but all we ever do is talk about Casey, you know.
Life isn't what you always want it to be,
Miss Ellen fucking DeGeneres!
Hey, Casey, he took the boat!
I know where he Is.
You know...
you should come back with me to Mexico.
There's plenty of senoritas there for you.
Bite?
You know,
your relationship is at the mercy of her family.
You know, it's abuse.
Carmen.
No, it is; it's like she's mind-fucking you.
Carmen, you know, when you've had a relationship
for more than one night, then you can talk to me, okay?
What color is that?
Flamingo.
Jamie, what are we gonna do?
He'll come around.
Oh, I don't know.
What did I do that was wrong?
Maggie.
Nobody loves their children more than I do.
I know.
Maybe we should call the police.
No, I don't want the police involved.
He's already on probation.
It'll only make things worse.
Well, how about that woman-- his caseworker?
She called this morning, said to call her if anything came up.
Alexandra-- what do we need her for?
Because he might get himself into trouble again.
[beeping]
What's that?
It's my beeper.
You have a beeper?
Yeah, for work.
Someone's having a fucking Christmas crisis.
Invite them over; we'll do their nails.
Yeah, right.
Oh, shoot.
Hello, This is Alexandra.
Did someone beep me from this number?
Uh, hi.
How are you?
Uh, no, it's no problem.
I'm on duty all weekend.
I don't mind at all.
Uh, that does sound serious.
Well, I saw him just recently,
and he was actually doing really well.
Yeah, I could.
Um, sure.
No, it just takes about 15 minutes.
[no audio]
I have the address.
No problem.
Okay, I'll see you soon.
Bye.
What's happening?
Andrew is missing.
Oh, shit.
This is fucking great.
Can I help you?
No, I'm going.
Fuck.
Jesus Christ.
I gotta take a piss.
Back it up, Dopey.
(Andrew) When do you care?
Drew, come on.
Don't be like that.
Come on, Casey, tell me to jump.
Stop, Drew.
So Alex is your girlfriend.
Yeah.
I didn't even know you were gay.
I know. Me neither.
Obviously, we haven't talked in a while.
A while?
How long have you known?
Five minutes.
Casey.
I don't know. Six years.
Intense, huh?
Why does everybody always have to protect me?
We all love you.
You're still the baby.
What about Adam?
Um, he was a prick.
You're right.
I always wondered why you never brought anybody else home.
Well, I've been with lots of people.
You guys just never knew about it.
Like Alex.
Yeah.
Like Alex.
Go ahead.
(Shawn) Hey, Is your little game over now, huh?
Hey, that was real funny.
What were you, working on your standup routine?
Give it a rest, Shawn.
Hey, Derek was my best friend.
You don't even know how I feel.
You know what? We gotta move on.
Oh, I'm just fine being miserable, thank you.
I'm glad it was so easy for you to move on, though.
You know, how is your little life
that you never bring home, anyway?
We both know why I don't come home, Shawn.
Maybe you both can move on if you actually talked about it.
Oh, yeah?
What do you know about it?
What do you know about any of this?
I know, Shawn.
I was there that night.
I followed you guys.
(Casey) Oh, shut up, Derek.
Geez, stop wiping your ass.
[snoots, spits]
Pthh!
[urinating]
Hey, turn around, will you, Case?
Man, it's one week till I get the car.
One week.
We're gonna be out every night.
Yeah, right, man.
You know, all you do is ever talk, talk, talk.
What are you doing?
I'm going in.
Yeah, right.
If I go, you go.
Go ahead. Do it.
All right.
I dare you.
You go, and I'll go.
(Casey) Come on.
Jump.
I'm going.
Ahh!
splash! splash!
Derek!
Shit.
Derek.
Come on, man!
Derek, come on, cut It out.
Shawn!
Derek?
Derek!
Derek, come on!
Derek!
Shawn, where Is he?
Derek!
What were you doing there?
Shawn, he was 1 2.
I ran.
I never should have egged him on like that.
Jesus, look at you.
I can't even have my own guilt.
I mean, look,
I don't know why we never talked about this.
We never talk about anything in this family.
Well, look who's talking.
You want to buy 'shrooms, LSD, crack?
This here's your neighborhood dealer.
The whole town knows about it.
So it's true?
Except for crack.
I never sold any of that shit.
Alex told me they were gonna lock you up.
Yeah, what else did Alex tell you?
Not much.
How come you didn't talk to us?
(all) Mom.
(Casey) Thls ought to be a lot of fun.
(Shawn) Jesus, she looks like an executloner.
All she needs is the hood.
And the ax.
I fail to see the humor.
You ruined Christmas for your entire family,
and all you can do is laugh.
Uh, please.
We didn't ruin anything.
And, uh, Christmas is tomorrow.
[doorbell rings]
(Maggie) We called your caseworker.
Oh, hi, Alexandra. Thanks for coming down.
Come on in.
So.
Well, Andrew came back, and everything's fine now.
(Jamle) Where do you think you're going?
Can you explain your absence?
Dad, my world just got huge.
Andrew, we can work this out.
Just trust me, okay?
Yeah, right.
He knows.
What?
This is Alex.
Alex, Mom.
Uh, I think we all have a lot to talk about.
Maybe we could, um--
May l--l-- just wait a minute, okay?
Can I ask you something?
Yeah.
Do you have any idea what you are doing to my family?
Mom, what are you talking about?
I just want to know.
Um, I don't know what you mean.
I want to know who the hell you think you are.
I mean, you come Into thls famlly with your Ideas.
You have ideas about my son, ideas about my daughter,
and you lied to us.
Mom!
I mean, you lied to all of us.
You are supposedly guiding my son,
and you are sleeping with his sister? Mom, stop!
I just want to know, who the hell do you think you are,
Stop it! that we're supposed to listen to you?
Stop.
Alex, just go.
Casey.
Casey...
I'm sorry.
Don't touch me.
[weeping]
[tender piano music]
music music
I talked to Alex.
Yeah?
She saved my life, you know.
I mean, she's really cool.
I think so.
Shawn's waiting.
I'm going back up to school.
Mom's letting you?
She doesn't know.
More secrets.
I'm gonna call.
I'm not a junkie.
I just don't want you to think that. I don't.
I've changed, Casey.
We'll see.
Well, I'm gonna go.
Yeah.
See ya.
[tender piano music]
music music
[knocking]
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